When the Why Questions Won’t Let Go

We all have them, those persistent “why” questions that keep us awake at night. Why did this happen to me? Why is this taking so long? Why doesn't God seem to answer? Like a young child on a carriage ride through historic Savannah, bombarding the tour guide with an endless stream of questions, we too find ourselves exhausting our hearts with the unanswered mysteries of life.

The Christmas story itself is wrapped in unanswered questions. Imagine Mary, a young woman who received one of history’s most extraordinary announcements from the angel Gabriel. She was told her son would be great, would be called the Son of the Most High, would reign on David’s throne forever, and that His kingdom would never end (Luke 1:31–33).

These were magnificent promises. World-changing declarations. Yet the reality Mary faced seemed to contradict every word.

Picture Mary replaying those angelic words throughout her pregnancy, a single woman facing social stigma and uncertain circumstances. When she gave birth in a cave used as a stable, surrounded by animals in squalid conditions, did she wonder about that promise of eternal reign? (Luke 2:6–7)

As she watched Jesus grow up as a carpenter’s son in Nazareth, hammering wood, assembling tables, living an ordinary life for twelve years, where was the throne? Where was the kingdom? (Luke 2:51–52)

And then, in the most heart-wrenching contradiction of all, she watched her adult son face harassment, trial, torture, and crucifixion. How does a mother reconcile the promise of an eternal kingdom with the reality of a Roman cross? (Matthew 27:27–35)

We look back with 2,000 years of hindsight and say, “Oh, we understand now.” But Mary lived in the tension of unanswered questions. The angel gave her no timeline and no explanation of how these promises would unfold. Just the promise itself.

If you are in a season of life where the “why” questions are spinning in your mind, where circumstances do not make sense, where God seems silent, there are three powerful perspectives that can anchor your soul.

Consider the vastness of the Milky Way galaxy, roughly 100,000 light years across. That means if you could travel at 186,000 miles per second, the speed of light, it would take you 100,000 years just to cross from one end to the other. Mind-boggling, isn’t it?

Now realize that in the night sky, our entire galaxy appears as a tiny dot embedded in an incomprehensibly larger universe.

The same God who spoke this universe into existence, who maintains its intricate order, who keeps galaxies spinning and atoms holding together, this God knows your name (Isaiah 40:26; Colossians 1:16–17). Scripture tells us that you matter to the God who made all matter (Matthew 10:29–31).

When you are wrestling with questions that have no answers, step back and wonder at the One who runs it all. This does not solve everything, but it reframes everything. Your unanswered questions exist within the care of an infinite, all-powerful, all-knowing God.

The Bible is not just a collection of nice stories. It is the record of God breaking into human history again and again. He created (Genesis 1:1). He witnessed rebellion (Genesis 3). He immediately initiated a rescue plan (Genesis 3:15). He worked through nations, judges, kings, prophets, and exiles. He orchestrated events across centuries.

And then, at exactly the right moment, He sent His Son (Galatians 4:4–5).

The redemptive rescue mission of God is the most dramatic intervention in history. If He could accomplish that, sending His own Son to die for rebellious humanity (Romans 5:8), can He not break through to meet your need as well?

Consider the story of a waitress who served a young man she nicknamed “Dimples” at her restaurant. When he died unexpectedly, his loss created a void in her life that drove her back to church, back to God. The young man’s grieving mother walked alongside this waitress until she was ready to profess faith in Christ.

Out of profound pain came eternal hope. This is what God does. He redeems suffering. He brings beauty from ashes (Isaiah 61:3). He works in ways we cannot predict or control (Romans 8:28).

The angel told Mary, “Do not be afraid” (Luke 1:30). Think about that. She is about to be impregnated by the Holy Spirit, face social scandal, and risk losing her fiancé, yet God says, “Do not be afraid.”

God’s how does not always look like we expect. Sometimes He answers our questions directly. Sometimes He gives us exactly what we desperately desire. But sometimes, perhaps most often, He leaves the questions unanswered, the situation unresolved, the circumstance unchanged, yet gives us something the apostle Paul called “a peace that passes understanding” (Philippians 4:6–7).

This is the peace that allows someone facing a frightening diagnosis to maintain resilient hope. It is the strength that carries someone through grief with inexplicable grit. It is the confident assurance that nothing can shake our ultimate hope, even when the present moment makes no sense (2 Corinthians 4:16–18).

But here is the crucial truth. Accessing this perspective requires one essential step. You must accept that you are not in charge.

Hebrews 1 describes Jesus as “the radiance of God’s glory and the exact representation of his being, sustaining all things by his powerful word” (Hebrews 1:3). He is superior to everything, to angels, to human wisdom, to our own understanding. He is the heir of all things (Hebrews 1:2), the King of kings and Lord of lords (Revelation 19:16).

The good news of Christmas is that Jesus has come as King. And because He is King, you no longer have the right to determine your own way. Everything, even your unanswered questions, is submitted to His authority.

This is the dividing line between strong faith and no faith. The willingness to say, “I am not in control, and I am okay with that because the One who is in control is good, wise, and loves me.”

This Christmas season offers a perfect opportunity to realign our hearts. The baby in the manger reminds us that the God who runs the universe cares enough to enter our world (John 1:14). The cradle points to the cross. The cross leads to an empty tomb. And the resurrection assures us of eternal hope (1 Corinthians 15:3–4, 20).

When the “why” questions will not let go, remember this. You matter to the God who made the Milky Way. You matter so much that He sent Jesus into this tiny corner of the universe, to this earth, to the cross, through the grave, and back to heaven (Philippians 2:5–11), all so you could have hope both now and forever.

The questions may not be answered this side of eternity. But the One who holds the answers holds you, too. And that changes everything.

This reflection is drawn from Pastor Fred's message My "Whys" and His Worldwide Reign.
We invite you to watch the full message and hear how God meets us in our unanswered questions, especially during the Christmas season.